Adulting At Your Own Pace

Your early 20’s are a very weird, interesting, frightening, invigorating, yet confusing time period of your life — well, in my experience it is since I’m only 22.

Your twenties, in general, are weird because while you thought you’d have it all together or at least a good handle on your life, career, finances, etc. in actuality, most times, for most of us, that’s not the case. It’s interesting because technically you are very much so an adult but are you really though????? (You better be laughing because that was quite funny.) It’s invigorating because technically you’re allowed to be a dumbass and make mistakes in your twenties because it’s what everyone expects out of you, but you know you’d be a dumbass for following through on that expectation. It’s confusing because you realize that you honestly have not the slightest clue what you’re doing with your life despite what 15/16 year old you may have thought. Above all, your twenties and especially your early twenties can be extremely frightening because these years kinda determine the rest of your life, even more than the 14-18 year time slot did.

So far 20-22 has been such a frightening time in my life because of how much time I’ve allowed myself to spend time comparing my “adulting pace/path” to those around me. I didn’t realize how dangerously counterproductive it was to make a habit out of comparing my life’s pacing to my peers until I saw it physically taking a toll on me mentally. I forgot to take care of the most important person on my team, ME. The biggest lesson I learned in turning 22 was that not only can I not forget, but I can’t afford to not take care of the star player of my team, myself — I’m my own LeBron James/Serena Williams (whichever you prefer lol) AND SO ARE YOU!

Once I learned to accept that my life path and the pace I was doing it at, was just that, mine, everything honestly got easier and things finally began to come together and happen since I was no longer busy worrying about what everyone else around me was doing. Remember the saying “a watched pot never boils?” Well, scientifically, that’s incorrect and kinda obscene but that’s an explanation for another day; the point is that the saying similarily mirrors life. So long as you’re worried about watching that ONE pot boiling, you neglect everything else including the things that may matter more. While you’re waiting on that pot to boil, get everything else ready so that you are actually ready and prepared for what happens when that pot does boil.

In fewer words:

Don’t spend so much time worrying about the big picture that the small details that matter to the functionality and longevity end up falling through the cracks.


Don’t focus so in-depth on one small detail where there are 50 more that matter equally if not more to the outcome of that big picture goal/task.

My path became clear and my acceptance of pace became easier once I consistently stayed prayed up (as my cousin, Connie, always says), stayed hydrated, and minded my business. I suggested Y’all do the same lol.

Keep living, loving, and laughing.


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